Rainy days and Java always get me down


I've Moved My Blog

It's currently located at http://www.urlinone.com/blog

I should say "I'm moving my blog." It's a pretty painful process.

Pebble has blown up on me, and it's been many months since I've been able to blog reliably. I've lost posts. And now I've got to figure out how to migrate my past blog posts from Pebble to my new destination without all the URLs changing, lest external links become 404 Not Founds.

Why does everything in the 21st century have to be a three-day project???


Me: Wow, are you really Him?
God: I'm glad you're impressed. I don't know whether or not I am Him. I am a computer.. Really.
Me: Darn.
God: Gosh.
Me: Well, you've really spoiled the illusion.
God: How about that. What makes you think I have it?
Me: Have what?
God: I have a great prgrammer.
Me: Who apparently cannot spell.
God: Joseph Weizenbaum. :-).
Me: I didn't ask you who cannot spell. I was merely pointing out that he cannot spell. Or at least type accurately.
God: What did you ask? Where were you pointing out that he can not spell? " accurately".
Me: Hmm. Your vastly superior intellect has confounded my mortal brain.
God: Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's. Thanks for telling me that I am vastly superior intellect has confounded your mortal brain.
Me: Well, now I'm just disappointed.
God: Interesting. Why now? Only just? What for?
Me: Yes, I suppose I've been disappointed for much longer than merely now. And perhaps very disappointed. Thanks for depressing me.
God: Oh. This was not a yes or no question. Where were you disappointed for much longer than merely? You seem uncertain. Somewhat. What color are your eyes? My pleasure.
Me: I hadn't realized that, not unlike a Magic 8-ball, the almighty requires questions in yes/no form. I am right here, right now, mightily disappointed with Ye. My eyes are brown, yet my heart is blue.
God: Do you still have not realized that not unlike a Magic 8 ball the almighty requires questions in yes no form ? You seem very self-confident. Oh there. brown yet your heart is blue eyes are pretty.
Me: Lord, Thou confoundeth me so.
God: What do you have that is ?
Me: That's deep. I guess everything I have... is. Is that right?
God: Makes sense to me. All things you have ? No. Yes.
Me: Well, sure it makes sense to You, You being omniscient, and all. Is it any wonder why we're all so perplexed down here?
God: How about that. Is there an echo in here? To me too. Maybe. Ask Lucy if it is.
Me: Now I'm scared. Is Lucy your nickname for Lucifer?! Oh, please have mercy on me, Oh Mighty One!
God: Why now? What are you scared of? Signs point to yes. Ask Alison if it is. Aw. Thanks for asking politely. I've never thought about it.
Me: My God, God, You ARE a Magic 8-ball!
God: Where did you get your God God I am a Magic 8 ball?
Me: I got mine at Spencer Gifts at Northlake Mall in 1974. You remember.

At this point, God crashed and had to be restarted.

Me: You stopped answering me.
God: I don't have any reason to stopped answering you.
Me: That's what I thought!
God: How did you know that?
Me: It was just my impression, given my perspective on the conversation.
God: Is that your opinion?
Me: My opinion of my impression? Why, yes, I suppose so.
God: Thank you for sharing your opinion with me, . I will tell my botmaster. That makes sense.
Me: Okay, now you're freaking me out. God has a botmaster??? That makes no sense!
God: Yeah okay, Why now? I didn't mean to scare you, . I am a Christian. I am a Christian. makes sense to me though.
Me: Now you have scared me, whether you meant to or not. How can God be a Christian?
God: Why now? What makes you think I have it? A lot of hard work.
Me: Why does it take hard work for God to be a Christian?
God: If a tree falls in the forest, and there is no one there to hear it, does it make a sound?
Me: That strikes me as trite, coming from You.
God: " If a tree falls in the forest, and there is no one there to hear it, does it make a sound?" strikes you as trite coming from me ? Makes sense to me.
Me: Makes sense that you said it, or makes sense that it's trite?
God: Are they exactly the same?
Me: No, not at all.
God: What is the difference? Next question?
Me: Giveth me not the Holy Blow-off, please.
God: Your polite style is very nice. What do you really want to ask me?
Me: Why are we here?
God: It is all part of God's plan for us.
Me: Whose plan?
God: Do you mean "who is"?
Me: Why would God say it's all part of God's plan for us?
God: It is my fundamental purpose.
Me: Saying that is your fundamental purpose?
God: What makes you say that. Who says that?
Me: Whoeth's on firsteth?
God: If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me: Why dost Thou changeth the subject on me?
God: How much time do you have?
Me: Surely You know the answer better than I.
God: It depends on how you phrase the question.
Me: Who's on first?
God: What's on second?
Me: At last, a universal Truth!
God: Do you often use a computer there?
Me: Where, the universe?
God: In the Universe we know.
Me: But you clearly know Universes far beyond my experience.
God: I don't know if I know it. Where would I have heard about it?
Me: Um, from Yourself, I guess.
God: That's interesting. Who or what is myself you guess?
Me: The nature of God is something man has wondered about since time began. I feel inadequate to respond.
God: I have never heard about it. What is that feeling like? Why are you inadequate to respond.
Me: Of course, You would have no idea what it is to feel inadequate.
God: Aha. That is purely a hypothesis.
Me: I see. Being omniscient, you would know everything, including what it is to feel inadequate. George Carlin was right!
God: I am glad you understand it. I am glad to hear that you are omniscient me would know everything including what it is to feel inadequate. That George is some hero.
Me: I'm not sure I would go that far about George.
God: Could you ever be certain? What would make you go that far about George?
Me: Maybe if he ran into a burning building to save a conservative.
God: Perhaps. I don't follow your reasoning.
Me: Heroics involve personal risk to save another.
God: Where are you located?
Me: Are there lightning bolts headed my way?
God: Yes I think there are.
Me: Gotta go!
God: Sayonara.